slower speed than ever, taking a longer and sweeter time. didnt know why i felt so upset after the conversation. guess pretty much it was obvious.

millions of apologies for that sudden reaction, alot of thots came to mind and guess cos i cannot justify them. i didnt know exactly why i was upset, but i do feel very low. i still yet to know though the reason why. guess is just on my part i am thinking too much.. i dunno.. and i dun like this feeling........

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QT today on - doing something out of nothing.
my 'nothing' moment includes journey to work, pockets of moments whereby i will take time away from work to simply surf or staring out of the window, and even at the toilets. (:

when i pondered... moments like this i found myself conversing with God within me. i enjoyed this, not the usual "... in Jesus's name i pray, Amen!" but rather having Him being a part of my life, rather a BIG part! how wonderful it is.. but some time i will just want to be still and watch the scenery that passes me by be it on train, bus, car etc... not being pessi but rather to enjoy simply being peaceful, not having to think of work, sch or things that bothers me (seldom there will be though).

my take away from this is that giving God moments like this will actually refresh ourselves from the things that we are doing/thinking. personally it encourages me each time i go into moments like this. i will find my heart worshipping and also conversing.

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on sunday, Lawrence (quoted Justin) that when we seek God for an answer, we pray, and when there is still no response, we make the best decision (based on what i get, though not the exact). i was marvelled at how we can have this relationship with Him, God has a plan for us, yet He also allow us to make choices on our own. once in bs, someone shared that God gave us choices to make our own decision, when we are wrong, He also provide U-turns for us to be aligned to His plan. sometimes the choices are so clear but yet our very own nature decided to go against His will or we simply refuses to let go and let Him take control. sometimes i wondered what will His reaction be when i made the wrong choices, will He be upset, or thinking that this silly girl is going to take a long time? i am always thankful for the grace that He has for us or rather for me... it is really beyond imagination yet it is so wonderful.

anyway the above are random thoughts, not very well summarised, but are thoughts for myself to think deeper and thoughts that i have it within me over the weekend.

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i met hanwei today! he happened to be clement's polymate... how nice it is to again meet another pri sch fren.... haa and he can still remember the old times... interesting...

alright off to bed.... very very late....