aint happy when you are unhappy.
these few days woke up having the reluctance to do something..
and there's this unsettled feeling inside me for very long, it is so unusual for it to be inside for so long..

maybe my focus has shifted..
today read In The Upper Room, i realised i haven spend ample time with Him.
my focus over the last period wasnt on Him, which is my fear..

last night, u told me i am cautious, yes i think i am..
on one hand i didnt want to discourage you and on the other hand i wanted to prepare myself
i wish to have the time to imagine abit, to adjust abit, to get myself ready..
i didnt feel happy going back these few days.. i do feel discouraged and disappointed too.. i do feel the difference..

sometimes i wonder is it i cannot read you well enough..
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remaining still, knowing that You are God, the one in control.