Sacrifice-Bob Fitts- With lyrics.

what great love that God had showered upon us.

received this from Isabelle this morning.. so sweet aint it?

haven seen her for a while since i left, what's more she only joined GB this year, anyway a nice girl (:

i dont have motivation towards my work... how? been taking my own sweet time in doing stuff i realised...........

i think because of my OT-ing... and i realised i haven seen my dad for 2 days! oops..

Exodus been telling me abt being used as a vessel of God - like how God used Moses & Aaron (Vessel of Fragrance, haha sound familiar, how about sitting down camp?), to make things happen through me. i thought before surely i can be one? though i have been praying for God to use me to fulfill His purpose. (:

i dunno what to update le......... boring.......

saw this pic on my comp, reminded me of the convenant that God made during Noah's time (Gen 9:12-17). it reminded me, too, of what law shared when rainbow appears, it could mean God needed that as a reminder, can you imagine how upset He could be with us?!?

anyway then saw this:

21 The LORD smelled the pleasing aroma and said in his heart: "Never again will I curse the ground because of man, even though [a] every inclination of his heart is evil from childhood. And never again will I destroy all living creatures, as I have done.

22 "As long as the earth endures,

seedtime and harvest,

cold and heat,

summer and winter,

day and night,

will never cease."

as long as the earth endures... will never cease-will it somehow link to the work of men, civilization? i have heard disasters came due to human work, global warming... i wonder...am i thinking too far cos of recent disasters?

i like this song... maybe it caught my attention because the way the singer sang it (haa)... haven really understood the meaning of the song though, but catchy tune i thought (:

不知道为了什么忧愁它围绕著我
我每天都在祈祷快赶走爱的寂寞

你要我听这一首歌用这首歌离开我
她唱的太美了歌词却很伤人
你为什么不直接提分手

爱人的话不需要重轻轻的说我就懂
接你的车来了表示爱到站了
我站在十字路口对抗心痛一个人

你的黑发现在睡进谁的胸口
你的唇现在跟谁要温柔
一开始你爱我最后你放弃我
还要用千言万语说得委屈你有多难过

爱牢牢抓紧我恨深深包围我
你要我为你好快赶走爱的寂寞

爱人的话不需要重轻轻的说我就懂
接你的车来了表示爱到站了
我站在十字路口对抗心痛一个人

你的黑发现在睡进谁的胸口
你的唇现在跟谁要温柔
一开始你爱我最后你放弃我
还要用千言万语说得委屈你有多难过

爱牢牢抓紧我恨深深包围我
你要我为你好快赶走爱的寂寞

爱牢牢抓紧我恨深深包围我
你要我为你好快赶走爱的寂寞

Pray 24-7...

indeed, i prayed like i never pray before.. this was my prayer each time before the prayer session. i prayed for a revival within me each time. all i can say is, thank God for journeying with me all my walk with Him, my every paths i chose, even when i made the wrong move, God will gently direct my path. who am i to deserve His attention, to deserve to be the chosen one, called His child?

indeed, this is a privilege. this is not a chance, it is a plan, a perfect plan of God.

when i was younger, i used to imagine that God owns a lot of book shelves that are used to display our 'portfolio' (though i am not sure if God is high tech to track using a computer instead), each book is named, by our name. i wanted God to be please when He is reading mine, i wanted Him to be proud that i have run a good race, fight a good fight for Him, and He is smiling when He look into my life.

many a times, i think i have made Him sad, what i feared most is when i do not even know that i have sinned and it is seemingly right to me. that's then scary.

recently, the world's attention falls on China and Myanmar, the 7.9 quarke and cyclone nargis caused many lives lost, and adding to the totality of broken families overnight. this is so sad, my heart goes out to them. i wondered how many believers are in the midst of those who lost their lives. many said this is a wake up call to the unbelievers and believers alike, i think it is also a time that i wonder what can i do. How God can use me? there are many who have yet to believe in Him, there are also many who have yet hear abt Him.

i hope i can do something... so sad to watch the documentary.

over the last week, church embarked on a 24-7 prayer week, went to church to pray on wed and fri nights. had an extended prayer session on sat night 2-6am, so worn out on sunday. but i really do felt that i really prayed like never before. since 2 am, we have been worshipping Him, lasted all the way till after abf. indeed personal revival (:

I AM SO DISTRACTED TODAY! haha... that's not very good...
distracted by what i do not know...

life is getting a little boring i think..although this week i am suppose to be pack with activities, but somehow i still think it is boring, why? sometimes i just dont wish to do anything but to watch ppl getting ard with their busy schedule while i enjoy a nice drink in a nice cafe.... (:
cousin is not meeting me for dinner, well that's because i will be seeing her coming fri to sun (her reason, haa).

cousin & lawrence, thanks for your concern last night! (: yeah i know ppl ard me cares (haa, my fav sentence)

a little abt things @ work since i am so free now...
i was advised to cut off ties with the previous colleagues i worked with, esp since a new person has taken over. i do understand her agony when ppl bypass her and speak to me, even for simple matters. i don't how. not me to simply say, please do not call me anymore for i am no longer handling your acc. ok, i think she is really disappointed and fuming yesterday. i will try not to interfere between them.

my colleague advised me on my weak point, being too trusting. she said i trust ppl easily, though i hardly know them. hmmm... is written on my face again? diao.... just been nice and giving others the benefit of doubt, is tiring to be defensive and observing ppl leh. anyway unless the first impression i have of you is bad, then guess that's too bad. haa!

aside to my walk with God...
alright embarked on Gen, still is. a little slack with bs, guess gonna do it tonight.. (:
pray for the disasters in Myanmmar and CHina. glad that sze & sam are fine.

okie my random thoughts above... am bored la...

i am tired... really... by all the qns and i dunno how to answer them anymore. i may chose to frustrate it instead. sorry if i vented it on you, i really think i did.

i was approached like last year regarding this and since then, many who knows me came to ask if i am going to take over. i think am tired of being in the lime light at times, esp when ppl ask "what's going to happen after she step down?? oh JAMI taking over is it? good good!"
when i qns "why me??" - "because only you and you are the best option" (i qns if this is from God?) somehow i don't really like the reply, it seems like a best way out, without considering my feelings and my thoughts.

many tried to talk me out into this, honestly i didnt want to pick it up because i will surely come to the same situation as of now some years later. and i do know myself, i do have my insecurities - i feel that i am not strong enough (emotionally though i may not show it). yes, friends said they will be there (and i am a team player, i do need support - physically there). i appreciated that. i do appreciate too when ppl have that faith and trust in me that i can do a good job or i can be a good leader. i do appreciate when ppl i hardly work with finds me a great person to work with. i give this glory to God for making who i am. but, is this the reason for ministry?

ministry to me is a commitment - at least 2 yrs. have i become a need to the company? outsiders see it as this. and i do appreciate ur 8 reasons to me, really... i am touched by ur sharing, love ya k, i nearly teared, yes! am really sorry, but thanks alot for the trust in me.

says:
hear me out
JAMI. says:
ok..
I cut off my pony tail says:
1. to me it must be in a hand of a resposible person.
2. The one must know it very well, cos it's a company which had been running for more that 10yrs
3. The one must know the current problem in it, so that changes can be make when she take over.
3b. This is the most important because i have been in it long enough to know that there are lots of changes to make it better.
4. The one must have a heart for it, not just take up because she wants to serve GOD, but out of LOVE for this company and wants to serve GOD through it. Not through it to serve GOD.
5. The one of the it must have very gd coummiuncation with sch, becos we all know that all the teachers that comes in dont last.
5b. to make teachers that comes in have a feeling like home and be devoted to our work, the one must be extrem humble to hear others point of view of
5c. this has been a major promble in my point of view, and i think this will cos great change inthe gals involvement too. See EC case, when she influnces us so much, guided us so much
6. The one must have gd relationship and commuication with church too. it now is lack of someone who can commuincate with church and the current one is not having a too gd relationship with current church now.
6b. Even though one is not from the church, she should still keep in close contact with church. I would not say that the current one is not doing that, cos i dont know. But i know that this will be a great challange for the future one.
6c. Even that a challange if the one is humble, GOD house will not stir up in it becos GOD is incharge and he will not allow this to happen.
6d. From what i know, church have no woman or full time staff who is capable of taking up this responsibilty.
7. The one of it must be able to see and plan a future this company, someone who can see what level should this company be brought to.
8. The one must be a gd accountant, to take care of the company spending and funds.

says:
from all the 8 pointes above ~ these are what i think a one of it should be
says:
some how ~ you have meet them
says:
i listed them for you not that i want you to take up
says:
but from a person who loves it and i know for sure i am not the one who will take over deep from the bottom of my heart
says:
that for sure
says:
so to me the one of it must be like this wheather izzit you or someone eles, for we know the situation better than anyone
says:
So i guess this is also y i ask you to take up the post, not because there is only you, but rather is only you who can do it.
says:
\Not everyone can do it, of cos there will be someone better than you who can do the job
says:
but to me you look like you are plan to do it, i see a growth in it in future when i think of it in the hands of yours
says:
becos you have the passion for these gals and you the most humble person i met whom i believe can stand btw the gap of sch and it
says:
it will also growth in yr hands becos you know what is best for her and you know what she is lack of and what she needs.
says:
like a mother
says:
i truly believe in this
says:
let GOD's will be done and not mine


*the above is an unedited version of the convo, i hesitated if i should post this or post and change blog! but well, to me nothing to hide, perhaps is just someone's point of view. i dont doubt my own leadership, some do know i dont have the confidence as well. yes, the solution is pray and ask God for strength, i do know not that i did not do it, but to me this is not the priority yet. i am glad with what i am doing right now, i think i need a break from there. this reminded me ru sent me an article and spent time with me to understand what a leader should be. honestly, i really do think i cant cos i am not a far sighted person, i just shared recently that even my own life plan is till before i turn 25... i dont even know if i can see that far in other areas.

ok, i think i seem vexed, a little by all the questions being asked when ppl sees me. i dunch know, let the last sentence, let God's plan be done. so can stop asking me? ask God?? (:

it has been a long time! (:

okie what should i say.....

work is hectic because it is month end.

school is over because i just finished my exam. yay!

went to watch Iron Man today with the usual ones. the movie was so so so nice....
despite being tired after knocking off at 10pm, i enjoyed the whole show.
(really sorry to make u guys wait for so long, sorry!)