sorry to vent it on you over the same issues again. it is too much for me to bear. it really stumbles me and i do not know if i know Him.that feeling is so scary, my first time encountering it,crying it out doesn't bring me comfort.

now i do not know how to carry on. i leave it to Him in total control of it. prayed and i felt peace.
i just needed to blog it out. so it will remind me and to see the grace of God.

i want to run away from it (rather can i stop running), but i can imagine no matter how far or fast i run, ppl catch up and i will find myself in the same pit again. i nv felt this before. it is this time that i truely know i need Him.

i hope i am doing fine. and will be fine. at the end of it, i hope to hear Him say, "Well done, my faithful servant".

i dunch wanna talk abt this anymore....
dun ask me too....
guess i just want a good sleep later...

was reminded about 'running a good race' for Him. trials are there to mold us, so that we can be trained to be more Christ-like. my life, my race, is it good? a Christian life is really hard, but i really dunno what will happen to me if i hadn't know Him.and precisely because of this, hanging out with Christians already form a big part of my life than non-christians, it is also where i feel more comfortable.